Muses with Moxie Fine Art

Fellow Muses,

No one prepares you for the vagaries and surprises that come with aging. 

Here’s an example from recent days (written in third person as a distancing mechanism!):

you find out, at the beginning-ish of your 6th decade that you have ADHD

and probably have had since birth, only undiagnosed.

That you’ve always considered yourself a bit on the wacky- and high-strung side is no big surprise. 

In fact, you learned to love or hate this aspect of yourself in direct correlation to the space- and patience- giving affirmation or head-shaking disappointment to your being this way. You learned quickly to find those who are calm and even-keeled.

You’re drawn to them because of their stillness, they’re drawn to you because of your energy?

Spark? Your low boredom threshold?

Oh boyo, doesn’t it make so much sense that because of the way your brain processes information and your uneven attention-capabilities,

you have anxiety. You have anxiety because you have ADHD, and because so much of your energy before now has been consumed in compensating for what may come quite quickly and easily for those without ADHD.

Okay.

So.

Add yet another acronym to your own personal list of existential realities: BS, MFA, c-PTSD, SAD, and now ADHD.

You might even have to take medication for this and you hate taking medication, unless absolutely necessary.

And if you take medication, it takes a while.

While that while is being taken you may experience side effects!

and or anxiety about those side effects!  Ha!

And yet, although it is late news and really not much of a surprise for your family and closest friends, you welcome

this new understanding of yourself—   late late, late as it may be—  especially if it helps you to be able to simplify every aspect of your life, you actually stress less!  

Wouldn’t that be great?!

Even though your little noggin’ is currently as streamlined as a sack of squirrels on a pogo stick, yet, you still dream of 

being able to have a conversation without losing your place or interrupting folks because you know you will forget what you were going to say if you wait for them to finish. 

Might have also really helped if you’d known more and sooner about your special brain, especially as you would have surely been the better informed parent and perhaps one able to readily recognize and calm any anxiety your kids might be experiencing due to their special brains.

Muses, in this, as in all else,

take it one day at a time,

one change at a time,

one step at a time.

Be patient with yourself.

Consider this surprise for its many gifts as well as its few regrets.

Above all, Muses, as poet Maggie Smith wrote and as the actor Dame Maggie Smith does, “Keep Moving.”

oh yeah,

Happy New Year!

Yvette